"A clean house...

is a sign of a wasted life."

It pains me to admit this, but once upon a time, as a newbie housewife, I was a devoted follower of Martha Stewart. There - I said it. It's out there and I can't take it back.

In those wacky, child-free days, I had the time AND the energy to clean my bathroom grout with a toothbrush, bleach my coffee cups and steam-clean my carpet, just because. (As in, not because a dog/child/turtle puked/peed/pooped on it.) Well those days are gone, baby, gone.

Now that we are considering selling this house and buying another, I've been slapped back to reality by the real estate pics of immaculately clean, flawlessly painted, IKEA-filled houses that just ooze comfort and charm. I love my house, but now that I really look at it, I see what a sloppy mess it has become in the nearly 8 years that we've been here. All of the paint needs re-touching, the hardwood re-sealed and the yard.. uhg. It's so overwhelming to think of all of the jobs, big and small, that await my attention, and yet...

Do I regret neglecting the weed whacking in favor of going fishing with Bill & the girls? Not for a second. I've technically had a million opportunities to show my home and yard the love that it deserves by doing bits of preventative maintenance here and there, but more often than not, I blow it off and lay in my hammock and read a book, take the kids the the Y or just grab a nap. Martha is dead to me, as I, no doubt, am to her.

So now instead of manic fits of getting my bathroom microscopically clean, I bribe the kids to clean it when I can. When I can't, it's me and my magic eraser and whatever we can manage to accomplish before I get distracted or interrupted. There is always a glob of toothpaste in my sink, the laundry is never done, and the weeds are winning the battle out back. And right now I don't care because the sun is out and my cherry trees are blooming and dropping their "pink snow" all over my lawn. Everyone that I love is happy and healthy and well-fed, and I don't think that Martha and her sparkling house can say the same.