Today my mood/health pendulum has swung back in the direction of blehh. I'm having another one of my sleep-a-thon weeks, and my dag-gum sinuses are back at it again. I feel very guilty on days like these when I am a total sniffling, snorting couch potato, even knowing that my fatigue is legit, because I feel like I'm not giving 100% to my family, critters, friends and other commitments. I baled on being an usher at Junior Programs today, now that, my friends, is lazy.
But laziness and fatigue don't win the day altogether. When I reflect on what I get done around here, even on a sick day, well, I don't feel so bad. Here's what I did today -
6:30 - Wake up, shower
6:55 - Wake kiddos
7:00 - Loaf on the couch half asleep, directing children to eat their breakfast and get a move on.
7:30 - Additional child badgering. Seriously, who takes 30 minutes to eat a piece of toast?
7:40 - Send kids out for critter patrol, start preparing goat rations.
8:00 - Go chip frozen goat water. Attempt to top off goat water, only to find that the hoses have all frozen overnight. Bring a 5-gallon bucket into the shower to fill with warm water.
8:05 - Carry 40 pounds of sloshing water a few hundred yards through semi-frozen mud to very thirsty goats.
8:20 - Kids finish getting ready for school as I bellow reminders to pack library books and brush teeth.
8:30 - Drive kids to school.
8:40 - Fall asleep on the couch while Facebooking. :(
10:30 - Wake up in a panic remembering that I'm supposed to be at Jr Programs in an hour. Decide to beg out, since I feel like I've been kicked in the face by an elephant, and could go for another nap.
11:00 - Finally give up on 2nd nap out of guilt for not having done laundry or gone to give my critters a proper visit yet today. Grrr...
11:10 - Bring snacks to the goaties and get my snuggles, bring bread and lettuce to the hens (who are locked in the run do to high hawk activity) and am greeted with soft clucks and much flapping.
Noon - Start laundry that I should have done yesterday. Oops.
Noon 'til 2ish - Drifting throughout the house doing weird little odds and ends that I'd never really think about as "chores", per say, like misting my shiitake mushroom patch, sterilizing the syringes for Chardy's antibiotic shots, digging up all of the books and dvd's that need to be returned to the library (Seriously - with the late fees I pay, they could build a wing of the library in our family's name.), taking out something for dinner, composing a grocery list, etc., etc.
Not too bad for a lazy day! It sure as heck helps to have a very supportive husband, kids who are old enough to dress themselves and tell time, a pizza man on speed dial and a lot of very supportive friends and family. They carry through my physical/emotional funks until I can get myself sorted out again.
So next time you get frustrated with yourself for not being on top of your game, take a minute to really think through what you've done with your day. We do more than we realize, even when we're not 100%. And it's worth remembering that acclaim and perfection aren't really what mothering is about. I'll take my loving, imperfect, spunky lovebugs over uptight, overachieving, high strung superstars any day. I am a Chicken Mom. I fawn over my babies, but don't hold them so close that they can't experience the world for themselves. I try to make the best nest that I can for them, but encourage them to also seek their own adventures, often against my own better judgement. I let them know that I love and accept them a million different ways, and they do the same for me. I'm allowed lazy days on the couch, because of the people and support systems that I am surrounded with, two of whom I gave birth to. They take me as I am and I them, or we all try to at least. They are growing up to be good people with good hearts and love and empathy to spare, and imperfect me and my underachieving ways had a hand in that. Take that, Tiger Mom.